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Colossians 1:3-13; 3:19 & Ephesians 5:25-28

Colossians 1:3-13; 3:19 & Ephesians 5:25-28


1. Paul uses two verbs in 3:19 with regard to the husbands (3:19)

(a) Love

(a1) It does not happen naturally
(a2) It originates from determination, will, and a proper theology of marriage
– Hard work
– It involves sacrificing the self
– Draws inspiration from Christ
– It is learnt
– Derives pleasure in building the other person
– To be content with
– To have a pardoning love
– Pleasing God is the primary motive
– To encourage and motivate
– To cheer, nurture and
– To be faithful

(b) Embitter

(b1) It happens naturally
(b2) It originates from emotion and selfishness—spontaneously
– Opposite of hard work
– Self is the primary focus
– Opposite of what and who Christ is
– It comes with birth, upbringing, etc.,
– Derives a kind of joy in the hurt of others
– To be pointed/sharp
– To cause bitter feelings
– To be resentful/anger
– To provoke and accuse
– To be emotionally and physically unfaithful

2. By nature, husbands can be resentful towards their wives (which needs to change)

(a) Openly
(b) Deceptively (this is more dangerous than the former one)

3. Husbands who are followers of Jesus Christ must be filled with the knowledge of the “will of God” which is to “love” their wives and not to “embitter” them (1:9; 3:19; cf. Ephesians 5:25-28)

(a) Husbands’ standard for loving their wives is Christ, who is:

(a1) Sacrificial
(a2) Self-giving
(a3) Forgiving

(b) Husband must learn from Christ

(b1) Words to sanctify them
(b2) Work for wives’ wellbeing that results in their cleansing and corrections

4. Husband must work in such a way that their wives evolve from imperfection (if there is any) to perfection

(a) To without spot or wrinkle
(b) To be holy and without blemish

5. Take Away

Look at Jesus constantly to be a Gospel centered husband