Jesus our Valentine

Bible Passage: Ephesians 5:25-33

I. Jesus’ love for the Church is the standard every husband must strive for when it comes to his relationship with his wife (5:25-26)

1. Jesus gave himself up voluntarily for the church [you give when you find value in the other person

a. “Giving Himself” here refers to disregard deliberately his likes and needs, but place importance to the interests and wellbeing of the other person
b. “Giving Himself” is not reciprocal-love or response-love, but it is the “love” given at first—sacrificial giving
c. “Giving Himself” is based on what is best for the one it is given to—church
d. This love originates from the one who loves, and it is not based on the one who is loved—often when the other person does not deserve it
e. This type of giving gives priority to her, not to himself
f. It is counter cultural to the Roman, Greek, or Jewish man

2. The goal of Christ “giving” Himself for the Church has three purposes (5:27)

a. To make her holy/perfect by means of his words

i. His love did not start because she was perfect
ii. But he helps her to be perfect through His words

b. To sanctify her

i. This involves her progress
ii. This involves her growth in the truth
iii. The process reflects in her character and conduct aided by the Holy Spirit

c. To present her to himself as an extraordinary person [He does not expect perfection at the beginning, but he equips her to become perfect]

i. Not having spots
ii. Not having wrinkle
iii. So, Christ works continuously to improve her from her blemishes

II. Regarding his relationship with his wife, a husband gets his model from Christ (5:28-33)

1. He keeps his interest aside and takes up the interest of his wife—i.e., to love sacrificially

a. Verse 28 goes like this: “So is the husband obligated to love his own wife as his own body”:

i. To love
ii. To give
iii. To sanctify
iv. To cleanse
v. To present

b. This is counter cultural
c. This is the counterpart of “submission” in verse 22
d. The submission of the husband is much greater and stronger than the submission of wife to her husband
e. Loving one’s own wife just as Christ loves the church is “self-love” (verses 28-30)
f. “Self-love” is NOT loving one’s own wife, not “loving himself”
g. Instead of being the ruler of the household, he becomes the servant

2. He shifts his loyalty from his biological family to his wife—leaves and cleaves (5:31)

Takeaway:

1. Celebrate Jesus our Valentine, Jesus
2. Jesus is the standard of our relationship with our spouse. Therefore, make changes based on the Standard
3. Make loyalty to your spouse the priority by placing less importance to other loyalties